Monday, November 8, 2010

Oh the Agony of It All!

I started this dumb diet. Seems I have excessive yeast in my system caused by eating too much sugar, carbs, and starch. The only problem is: everything I want to eat has sugar, carbs, and starch. I’m dying here. Oh, for the joy of a freshly glazed donut!
I know what the stuff is causing, but the desire is rampant. Everywhere I look I see something I want but am not supposed to have. It’s like my eyes are suddenly fixed on inappropriate foods. Don’t they know how hard this is?
Where is the urge coming from? According to my doctor, my body is craving what it wants in order to feed the problem. Kind of a self-perpetuating condition.  It likes the stuff I’m not giving it and wants me to fudge (oh, a piece of fudge would be wonderful!) and give in to the urge. That would satisfy the moment but long-term it would keep the problem alive.
In other words, to deal with the problem effectively I must deny it the stuff it wants.
Hum, sounds like general temptation. I am tempted when I am enticed by my own desires, James says. Inside my mind are cravings for things inappropriate for my life, impulses to do or say or ingest things that prove harmful to my testimony as being a child of God. Things that are out of character with who I really am.
It’s a battle. Do I go with the flow of desire which in turn feeds the desire all the more or do I deny the desire and win the moment? A daily, weekly, monthly, yearly choice.
Luby’s had everything I wanted but didn’t need staring me in the face. I could taste the pies, the chicken fried steak, the syrup-dripping bowl of fruit, but my mind knew it was wrong. My hand couldn’t reach for what the mind told it no. The world offers so much good but yet advertises what I don’t need in my life. But the flesh can’t say yes to what the spirit says no.
What a battle!

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